The idea of having a nice fat buffer is... I can relax a bit. I don't have to write a blog every week. If I want to write 3 one week, and none for a few weeks, that works. There is a buffer... and the buffer can absorb the vagaries of my writing inspirations... or lack thereof. And a 4 month buffer is a very healthy buffer... but over the last few months, my attention has been elsewhere. And now the buffer is gone... weep for the little buffer... sigh...
No buffer means I feel the stress of getting a post written and published. No buffer means I have no wiggled room. No buffer means I question whether I even want to continue doing this.
Now... my partner will tell you that all of this stress, anguish and gnashing of teeth is self-imposed. There is no Blog God holding a gun to my head saying... "You must publish a blog every week or... else..." Seriously, there isn't... This blog doesn't even have a tonne of readers who will *gasp* abandon me if I skip a week or two.
But... and you knew there was a "but"... this blog isn't really for others... it's for me (mostly). A place where I can write an express ideas and wrestle with things and get my thoughts out of my head. If someone else benefits from it... bonus!
There is a sweet spot of writing for me... when I have a bunch of posts in the bag... I can write or not write on a particular day and I'm OK. I can focus my writing on other blogs (I have several) and other projects.
It's not that I lack for topics, I have reams and reams of ideas and many, many draft posts that need some polishing and tweaking and research. But the month of April (it is April 2 as I write this) is full. I have tax preparation as Priority #1 for the first two weeks. Oh, and Airbnb cleaning... And then 10 days of working the pulpmill shutdown as Hole Watch (now that is a whole other post!). And then a conference to attend at the end of the month. And there goes April... poof.
So I sit here and write what's front and centre and real. I could skip a post... I could. I've done that in the past. But from experience I know what happens when I skip one post... one turns into two... turns into three... then 10... then 50. Before you know it, a whole year has gone by and I wonder why I am bursting with ideas and no outlet for them.
There is something soothing, comforting, satisfying.. .cathartic? About writing these posts. So I do try to keep at least one post coming out every week. They might not be long. They might not be deep. But they are real and reflect my current state of grumbling anxious panic... "Who the heck let a 4 MONTH buffer slip away...?"
Because let me tell you... it is way easier to post one blog a week as part of a blog post maintenance program, thereby keeping a rolling 4 month buffer... than to try and come up with 4 blog posts in 1 week! The difference between sweeping and snow shoveling... maintenance is always easier than catch-up...
Grumble...
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