O.M.G. The year is half over. As I sit here and write this, on July 1, I have no idea where the year went.
Never-mind June.
To be fair, I was out of town working from June 11-23, soooo there goes half the month but it seems like it was just June 1.
I follow these Hedger Humor cartoons in Facebook and every first of the month is the same... "It's June!" "What!!??"
So, obviously I am not the only one who is appalled at the rapidly accelerating pace of time.
Part of it for me is that I look back and think... what have I actually accomplished in the past month, 6 months, whatever. And it always leaves me feeling... inadequate. Wanting. Like... I should have more to show for this month!
Time is that one precious, non-renewable resource that we all have and we all get to spend in whatever way we choose. But at the end of the day, week, month... I often find that I have spent my time on the equivalent of junk food.... scrolling the news sites, scrolling Facebook, scrolling Instagram... watching cat videos... Under the guise of "relaxing". But this form of "relaxing" always leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth and a packet full of regrets. Sure, cat videos might make me smile but... seriously... there is so much more to smile about in real life... particularly if you had a real cat... but we won't talk about that. (We are going cat-less after our beloved Minnie passed away in April... we are strong... strong I tell you...)
Scrolling, scrolling, scrolling... it leaves me feeling empty, slightly bleh and filled with regret that I have let an hour fritter away. This is not unlike how I feel when I eat junk food... still hungry (give me more), feeling definitely bleh... and filled with regret.
But scrolling is so easy... it's right there... and just like junk food which has that perfect symphony of salt, sugar and fat... scrolling has just that right amount of addictive interest to keep us coming back and wanting more, more, more... but never feeling satisfied. You know when you open the bag of M&Ms... you can't just have ONE... they are so small, so yummy... and so you just gobble them up, one after the other... not unlike those short, small TikTok videos or Instagram Reels or... whatever... More, more, more!
I know this is probably a dopamine, endorphin, brain chemistry thing... social media is designed to keep us scrolling... the same way junk food is designed to keep us craving more.
And soooo... I find that time just slips away... eaten by my scrolling fingers... Day after day, week after week... month after month. I am sitting here at 6:24 am on a new day, of a new month, at the halfway point of 2024. Could I choose a different format for July? (I know this is getting published in late August so you won't have to wait long for the results of my experiment!).
Could I choose to do something else during those moments when I reach for the phone? Why the heck do I reach for the phone? Most of the time it's because it is easy... it is right there, always in my back pocket, always within reach. There is a reason for that... as an Airbnb host, I need to respond to guests soonest... but that also means temptation is always easily accessible. But perhaps I could have something else close by, my e-book reader, my journal, a pad of paper to write down thoughts. Heck, I could even just close my eyes, take a deep breath and have a mini-meditation.
I know that it is a habit. I know that I want to scratch that itch. And sometimes I find inspiration in my feeds... well... on occasion... ok fine... very rarely. Sigh.
So I am setting my phone's "Wellness" settings thusly:
- Total Daily Screen Time - 2 hours
- News/IG/FB Time - 30 minutes (that's 1 hour less than my normal intake)
And I'm hoping that being more mindful, more aware, more attentive, more present will.... slow down time. Maybe. Not sure.
But perhaps at the end of July, I can look back and not gasp in shock when someone says "It's August!" and wonder... where did the time go??
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